When Patrick and I began running, he would laugh at me for my "photo" finishes. It didn't matter if I was the last person coming in, I was determined to beat the person in front of me, to make me the second to the last person finishing.
Several racers will talk about how when nearing the finish of a race they begin to pick out targets, other racers, trying to pass them one by one till they cross the finish line. This is my process as well. As it turns out while I am slow for miles of running, I have a really strong end push and I can play the "passing game" pretty well. Only a few times have I been challenged at the finish line by other racers; normally, people my speed are simply "over it" at this point, having exhausted all energy just to see the finish line. They know they will cross it, and they rarely care that the girl, not in their age bracket, acts like Usain Bolt for the last 100 yards. In fact I am pretty sure most of them just glance backwards to make sure there isn't a grizzly bear on the beach; because if there was they would need to get their camera ready, since grizzlies are rare at the beach.
For me going elbows out is simply a way of life. It is determination bottled up. I race MY RACE, slow and steady, making sure each step or stroke is well placed and trusted. I race MY RACE for miles upon miles. I race MY FINISH LINE for only a split second, but that finish line is the culmination of it all, the training, the early mornings, the stretching, the aches and pains, it is all there and I earned that finish line.
My finish line is much like life, we travel steady, making strategic moves to better our situation, then we see it the obtainable dream and we push till we have nothing left in order to grab this moment. And if anyone stands between us and our determined goal we make efforts to present ourselves as the best option, as the person who trained for this moment.
Now I will clarify, I never play dirty. If I pass you in the end you have every opportunity to pass me back, to challenge me.
This was the scene this weekend at a half marathon. I was slow and steady, running with a group of friends. We had been jockying back and forth with another racer. We were a half mile from the finish line, in the final push. I began my sighting, unknowingly being followed by this fellow racer. She was in ninja mode, as I was in gladiator mode. I lengthened my stride. I quickened my steps. I made the final turn and I saw it!!! A little shadow. I heard it!! Footsteps quickening. And I thought, "OH HELL NO!!!!" She was there coming out wide to my side. I pressed my feet hard on the ground, my long legs had the upper hand. She was giving it her all. I began in the finial yards to pull away. I was there across the finish line just out of the reach of her and her shadow. My determination, quickly changed to humor. I laughed at my actions- let's face it I wasn't making the podium, but I sure looked like I was in the Olympics. After gathering my finish items, I turned to tell my fellow athlete, "GOOD JOB." I gave her credit for me being a few seconds faster in the race, she was my motivation to finish. She told me she had been watching and following me for some time. I was on her list. Now I am a target for her next race!
This finish was noted by Patrick, as he walked up laughing at me. What he failed to mention is that he had a similar finish. Yep, my laid back, calm, people loving husband came across the line elbows out looking to run over those in his path.
The sport of triathlon is no different than life- men and women are NOT the same!
We look at the world with different filters, simply due to our genders.
A quick example: When men pass by the "feminine hygiene" isle at Target, they cringe hoping to not have to stop and haul around a box of super absorbent anything!
Women on the other hand upon seeing the same isle, cringe thinking of moodiness and crams while counting down the days till "it" hits. One simple isle, two very different feelings, thoughts, and motivations to avoid.
Now that it is settled, women and men are different. Let me share some differences in the realm of triathlon.
Last weekend Patrick and raced a Sprint Triathlon, it was a small entry group and an even smaller female group. In fact while the men had three start waves the women only had one. In these small groupings it is easier to see how women behavior differently than men. I will break the event and actions down by events: Swim, Bike, and Run.
Women in the swim, often feel they have to prove or act like they can prove something out of the blocks on race day. I fall in to the "prove something" category for the swim. This is because out of all three events, I consider myself a strong swimmer. I am commonly at the front of the wave I am in and I often am in the top of my age bracket. I go out strong because I know in the water I can hold my own, dominate. But there are several women who simply push themselves to the front of the start line just to be there. They may be winning the event, but they are not strong swimmers. This is an intimidation move, like owls puffing up to scare off predators. Women don't talk as the clock ticks down to start, they stand there sizing up the competition; scooting and nudging to a "better" position. When the shot goes off, women turn into angry cats, claws out and all (literally). This weekend was a prime example of this mentality: I was up towards the front of the group, feet in the water. Over the course of 3 minutes about seven women snuck out deeper into the water in front of me. As we began to huddle, awaiting the start, there was some bumping and looks. Then the horn blew, I was suddenly pushed, not from the back by an over anxious newbie, no I was pushed from the side. In this moment my Fight-or-Flight kicked in, and since it was race day I gave into the fight side and upon my dive into the water I "gently" pushed the pusher-girl back, causing her to sink down slightly. Things quickly turned to hands, feet, and bubbles as the washing machine of swim starts took place. Women began to slid into their place in the pack. Still some pushing or "riding over" but that is to be expected- int eh sport. I was able to get out of the madness and into my zone, between the front and the second pack. The rest of the swim goes off without a hitch, although I look back a few times to make sure no one will beat me to the timing chip area. This is the women's start, no talking, lots of judging, and full body contact.
You may be asking how does this compare to the picture of the men's start. Well, men talk to each other, they smile, they joke, they say "excuse me" if they bump into each other. This doesn't mean they are not being as competitive. There are very comparative and elite men out there in these groups and they go to the front and are able to stay there without people who plan to backstroke the swim attempting to jump in front Men appear to be more focused on their race verses trying to get in the heads of others. Men will talk about race things during their wave wait; things like peeing in their wetsuit. Men also still wish each other luck right before going in the water; women did this before even getting close to the water together. This isn't to say all men are nice about things, I am sure there is pushing; however, when Patrick talks about the pushing in the swim starts it normally starts with the words, "The guy didn't mean to." Also, often times if men have come over top of me in a swim they quickly apologize or do a spot check to make sure they didn't kill me. The men's start is calmer, friendlier, and self placement based on ability.
I know I can't say too much as I am admittedly an aggressive female swimmer, but normally only when provoked, the rest of the time I swim in my own space and chase my own bubbles.
Now the bike and the run go much the same but with less physical contact as this would not be easily excusable as physical contact in the water. However, there still remains differences in these portions of the race. As men pass on the bike they often times say "good job" or give a head nod, even to other men in their age group. Women on the other hand spend time jockeying back and forth for positioning with few shared words. And when you are nice to other women on the bike course you are often met with looks of aggression, smiles or cheers.
In running, the last leg, the kindness begins to show amongst us scraglers; but if you say "way to go" to a woman speeding by in the other direction on her way to her finish, you will see notice that she has failed to notice you.
Where it becomes even more humorous is at the finish line. For women here we say sorry, laugh about our over steps, and cheer as others take the podium. We realize we all did it; we all accomplished this challenge; we all were out there in the heat or cold, in the wind and rain, in the murky waters. In this moment the lines for how men and women are different at race time begin the blur.
In the end the only fact still standing is we are all (men and women) standing in the isle of that store buying tampons, we are all there. We may not all understand why we are there, and we may elbow for the last box, but there we stand, all of us.
